So lets look at a few lessons that I have seen some of my clients learn the hard way and some points that may help your online dating journey be less daunting.
It Is What You Make It
You have to go into it with an open mind, otherwise, it wont work, simple. You are about to experience something that you never have before.
Ladies, you will experience sleazy guys that will invite you over after 2 sentences. Guys, you might witness young girls that appear interested, only to offer to sell you nude photos.
Even though this stuff happens way less on Bumble compared to other dating apps, its still out there in the online dating world. If you expect the worse, the reality shouldnt be that bad.
Just keep in mind that everyone on these online dating apps faces these negative aspects, dont let it turn you off, as its just part of it.
Trust Your Gut
I was recently speaking to a 62-year-old woman who had been through a separation and had started using Bumble for the first time.
She told me she had come across her fair share of guys she didnt click with, but after a week of using the app, really hit it off with one guy in particular.
Basically, when I quizzed her on why she was feeling this established men-coupon way, what it came down to was the fact that meeting essentially a stranger off the internet went against every single instinct she had.
It wasnt because she didnt like the guy or was getting a strange vibe, no, it was because she had never done it before.
I asked her “what does your gut tell you about this guy?” She instantly lit up and went a little red, and only had good things to say. Long story short, I strongly urged her to trust that feeling and meet this guy.
Afterward, she told me that she was extremely nervous before the meeting (very normal) but once they met she had the time of her life.
Ignore The External
Unless your friends have been using the app themselves, when you tell your loved ones about downloading an online dating app, they will have concerns.
Just like you had/have, which is probably the reason youre reading this. When I first raised the idea to get on to Bumble to the woman in the previous paragraph, she said, “oh, isnt that an app just for young people?”
When people have limited or no experience with something, dont take their warnings or anecdotes as gospel, it will just make things harder for you.
You Have To Make An Effort
This one is especially for you men out there. The reason I say that, is there is a little bit of a running joke in the online dating community that men getting on an online dating site for the first time have no idea how to take a good photo.
I constantly hear from new clients that they are fit and good-looking men in their 50s and dont understand why they arent cleaning up on Bumble, then I look at their profile and they have one photo which is a selfie taken from below and way too close up.
You have to make an effort, its as simple as that. Going into exactly what you can and should do to improve your chances is too long for this post, your best bet is to check out my full eBook guide for guys on how to use Tinder, even though its slightly different than Bumble the concepts and how to build an attractive profile will still relate.